Care of Your Children, a Protection Order or a Split in Gisborne? Get Clear Answers.

Who do the children stay with after we separate in Gisborne?

There's no automatic rule that children go to one parent — the Care of Children Act 2004 says the child's welfare and best interests come first and paramount. If you can agree, you don't need a court at all. If you can't, you can apply to the Gisborne Family Court for a Parenting Order setting day-to-day care and contact. For non-urgent applications you'll usually need to have done Family Dispute Resolution and the Parenting Through Separation course first. Our free Gisborne service can explain the path in plain English — call 0800 461 100.

How long does it take to get divorced in New Zealand?

The marriage can only be dissolved on the ground of "irreconcilable breakdown" under the Family Proceedings Act 1980, and the only way to prove that is to have been living apart for two years. You cannot shorten that two years even if you both agree. There is one narrow exception from October 2025: a survivor of family violence who holds a final Protection Order can apply for an immediate dissolution. To understand which applies to you, call our free Gisborne service on 0800 461 100.

How is property divided when we split up?

Under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976, once your marriage, civil union or de facto relationship has lasted three years or more, the starting point is equal sharing — relationship property such as the family home and assets built up during the relationship is split 50/50, regardless of who earned more or whose name is on it. Property you owned before the relationship, and most gifts and inheritances kept separate, is usually "separate property." How the line falls in your case depends on the facts.

Does it count as 'married' if we just lived together?

For dividing property, yes — a de facto relationship of three years or more is generally treated the same as marriage under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976, with the same 50/50 starting point. Under three years, the equal-sharing rules usually don't apply unless there's a child of the relationship or not sharing would cause serious injustice. You don't "divorce" a de facto relationship — dissolution only applies to marriages and civil unions — but the property and children questions are the same.

I'm scared for my safety — how do I get a Protection Order?

Under the Family Violence Act 2018 you can apply to the Gisborne Family Court for a Protection Order, and if it's urgent you can apply "without notice." A judge can grant a Temporary Protection Order based on your statement, usually within about 24–48 hours, before the other person is told. It becomes a final order three months later unless they object. If you're in danger right now, call 111 first. Call our free Gisborne service on 0800 461 100 to walk you through the process.

What is Family Dispute Resolution and do I have to do it?

Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) is government-funded mediation that helps separated parents agree on care arrangements without going to court. For most non-urgent Parenting Order applications you must show you've attended FDR within the last 12 months, and a free Parenting Through Separation course within the last two years. You are exempted from both where the case is genuinely urgent — for example where a child is at risk. We can explain whether your situation needs them.

Can I get an urgent court order about my children?

Yes. If your children are at risk of serious harm or there's a real safety concern, you can make a "without notice" application to the Gisborne Family Court, and a judge can make an interim parenting order — usually within about 24–48 hours — before the other parent is notified. Urgency also exempts you from the usual FDR and Parenting Through Separation pre-conditions. Because urgent applications are strictly assessed, getting the grounds right matters. Our free Gisborne service can help you understand them — call 0800 461 100.

Is legal aid available for family cases in Gisborne?

Family or civil legal aid can pay for a lawyer in many family cases — including care of children and protection-order matters — depending on your income, your assets, and the merits of your case. Note that legal aid is not available for the divorce/dissolution step itself. A legal aid lawyer helps you apply. The Tairāwhiti Community Law Centre in Gisborne can also give free advice if you meet their criteria. We can point you to both.

Do I need a lawyer, or can I do this myself?

Many people handle a straightforward dissolution or an agreed parenting plan themselves using the Ministry of Justice forms and the free Tairāwhiti Community Law Centre. But contested care of children, relationship-property disputes, and protection orders can be complex, and a without-notice application requires a lawyer's certificate to be filed. It's worth getting free legal information first to understand whether your situation needs a lawyer. Call our free Gisborne service on 0800 461 100 to help you decide.

What's the difference between dissolution and sorting out the kids and property?

They're three separate things. Dissolution (under the Family Proceedings Act 1980) only legally ends the marriage and needs two years apart. Care of your children is decided under the Care of Children Act 2004, and dividing what you own is decided under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976 — and both of those can, and often should, be sorted out long before any divorce. People lose time assuming "the divorce" deals with everything; it doesn't.

Is this service free, and is it confidential?

Our Gisborne service is live now on 0800 461 100, the information is free, with no income test and no web form. To be clear about what it is: we give general legal information, not legal advice, and using it creates no lawyer–client relationship — we are not a law firm. If your situation needs a lawyer, we can help point you to local Gisborne family lawyers or the Tairāwhiti Community Law Centre. Call 0800 461 100 any hour.