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Separation, Care of the Children or a Protection Order in Southland? Get a Clear Answer First.

Maybe you've just separated and you don't know who the children stay with tonight. Maybe you're frightened in your own home in Invercargill and you've heard a protection order can be granted within a day. Maybe you want a divorce but you're not sure you've been apart long enough. New Zealand family law is the same right across the country — the Care of Children Act 2004, the Property (Relationships) Act 1976, the Family Proceedings Act 1980 and the Family Violence Act 2018 — and your case would be heard at the Invercargill (Waihōpai) Family Court on Don Street. Before you sign anything, agree to anything, or assume the worst, get the facts in plain English. This is general legal information, not legal advice, and there's no charge.

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Family Law in Southland — what to do right now

If you are not safe right now, call 111 — the Police can act immediately and can help you apply for a protection order. Under the Family Violence Act 2018 the Family Court can grant a temporary protection order without notice (without telling the other person first) when delay would cause undue hardship or risk of harm, often within 24 to 48 hours, and that temporary order becomes final by law three months later unless it is challenged. If your worry is the children, no court order is automatic when you separate — you can agree care arrangements yourselves, attend the free Family Dispute Resolution mediation, or ask the Family Court for a parenting order. And if you want a divorce (a "dissolution"), the one hard rule is that you must have been living apart for two years before you can apply. Get the facts for your situation before a deadline or a decision passes you by.


The law in Southland: Family Law

New Zealand has one national legal system. There is no state or provincial family law — the same Acts apply in Invercargill, Gore, Te Anau and Stewart Island as in Auckland. What is "local" about your case is the court that hears it: for Southland that is the Invercargill (Waihōpai) Family Court at Cue on Don, 33 Don Street, Invercargill. The Family Court is a division of the District Court and handles separation, care of children, relationship property, dissolution of marriage and family violence.

Care of children is governed by the Care of Children Act 2004. New Zealand no longer uses the words "custody" and "access" — the law now talks about "day-to-day care" (where the child lives and who meets their everyday needs) and "contact" (time with a parent or other person who does not have day-to-day care). The single most important rule is in sections 4 and 5: the welfare and best interests of the child must be the first and paramount consideration in every decision, the child must be kept safe from all forms of violence, and the child should generally keep a relationship with both parents and with their whānau, hapū and iwi. When parents cannot agree, arrangements are formalised in a parenting order made by the Family Court. Importantly, the court usually expects you to try Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) mediation and to attend a Parenting Through Separation course before it will hear a parenting application — both are now free.

Relationship property is divided under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976. This covers married couples, civil union partners and de facto partners alike. The headline rule is equal sharing: once a qualifying relationship has lasted three years or more, "relationship property" — typically the family home, the family car, furniture, and assets and income built up during the relationship — is presumed to be split 50/50, regardless of whose name is on the title. Property you brought into the relationship, plus most gifts and inheritances, is usually "separate property" and is not shared. For relationships under three years, equal sharing does not automatically apply and the court looks at each partner's contributions, though there are exceptions (for example where there is a child of the relationship). Equal sharing can be departed from only in narrow cases where it would be "repugnant to justice".

Ending a marriage or civil union is dealt with by the Family Proceedings Act 1980. New Zealand is a no-fault jurisdiction: the only ground for a dissolution order is that the marriage or civil union has broken down irreconcilably, and the only way to prove that is to show you have been living apart for two years. You cannot shorten the two years even if you both agree, although you can live together for up to three months during that period while trying to reconcile without resetting the clock. You apply to the Family Court (jointly or on your own) and pay a filing fee — currently $242. Dissolution only ends the legal relationship; care of children and relationship property are dealt with separately. Family violence is governed by the Family Violence Act 2018, under which the Family Court can make protection orders to keep you and your children safe. All of this is general information about how the law works — how it applies to your particular facts is a conversation for a New Zealand-qualified lawyer.

Key Acts (national — same across New Zealand)

  • Care of Children Act 2004 — day-to-day care, contact and parenting orders; ss 4 & 5 make the child's welfare and best interests paramount
  • Property (Relationships) Act 1976 — equal (50/50) sharing of relationship property once a relationship lasts 3 years or more
  • Family Proceedings Act 1980 — dissolution of marriage/civil union; only ground is irreconcilable breakdown shown by 2 years living apart
  • Family Violence Act 2018 — protection orders, including temporary orders made without notice
  • Child Support Act 1991 — child support assessed and collected by Inland Revenue (IRD), not the court

Courts & local services (Southland)

  • Invercargill (Waihōpai) Family Court — Cue on Don, 33 Don Street, Invercargill; phone 0800 268 787
  • Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) — mediation you usually must try before a parenting application; free since 1 July 2025
  • Parenting Through Separation — free Ministry of Justice course most separating parents must attend
  • Southland Community Law Centre — Floor 2, Cue Building, 33 Don Street, Invercargill; free legal help for those on low incomes
  • Citizens Advice Bureau Invercargill — free, confidential information and referrals

Key thresholds & deadlines

  • 2 years living apart — required before you can apply for a dissolution (cannot be shortened)
  • 3 years — relationship length at which the 50/50 equal-sharing rule applies
  • $242 — current Family Court fee to apply for a dissolution
  • Temporary protection order — can be granted without notice, often within 24–48 hours; becomes final by law after 3 months unless challenged
  • Up to 3 months living together — allowed during the 2-year separation while trying to reconcile, without restarting the clock

The two-year clock for divorce, and the same-day protection order most people don't know they can get

Two things blindside Southland families more than any others. First, you cannot get a divorce in New Zealand until you have been living apart for two full years — there is no agreed fast-track, even if you both want it over tomorrow (Family Proceedings Act 1980). People make plans, sign settlements, or assume they're "already divorced" on a timeline the law simply does not allow. Second, if you are unsafe, you do not have to wait for a hearing with the other person there: the Family Court can grant a temporary protection order without notice — before the other person is even told — when delay would risk harm, often within a day or two (Family Violence Act 2018). Knowing which clock applies to you, and acting before a deadline passes, is where families either keep their options open or lose them. Get the facts for your situation before you decide anything.


Likely outcomes & penalties

Family law outcomes aren't punishments — they're decisions about your children, your home and your money, and in New Zealand many of them run on clear rules. Here's the realistic range of what is at stake.
Care of the children
Decided on the child's welfare and best interests (Care of Children Act 2004, ss 4–5), not on which parent "wins". Arrangements are set out in a parenting order covering day-to-day care and contact. You will usually be expected to try free FDR mediation and attend Parenting Through Separation first.
Relationship property
For relationships of three years or more, the family home, car, furniture and assets built up during the relationship are presumed to be split 50/50, whoever's name is on them (Property (Relationships) Act 1976). Property you brought in, plus most gifts and inheritances, is usually kept separate.
Dissolution (divorce)
Granted only once you have lived apart for two years and the marriage or civil union has broken down irreconcilably. The Family Court fee is currently $242. Dissolution ends the legal relationship only — it does not by itself decide property or children.
Protection order
A protection order can keep the other person away from you and your children and impose standard non-violence and non-contact conditions. A temporary order made without notice becomes final by law after three months unless the respondent challenges it; breaching a protection order is a criminal offence.

Mistakes to avoid

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Assuming you can divorce quickly if you both agree — the two-year living-apart requirement under the Family Proceedings Act 1980 cannot be shortened, so people make remarriage or financial plans on a date that doesn't legally exist yet.
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Thinking whoever keeps the children "wins" custody — New Zealand uses day-to-day care and contact decided on the child's best interests, and treating it as a contest to be won often backfires and damages the very relationship the court is trying to protect.
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Walking away from the family home or signing it over because "it's not in my name" — for a relationship of three years or more, relationship property is presumed to be shared 50/50 regardless of whose name is on the title.
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Filing a parenting application straight away without trying Family Dispute Resolution or attending Parenting Through Separation — the court usually expects both first, they're now free, and skipping them can delay your case.
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Believing you must wait for a court hearing to be protected from family violence — you can apply for a protection order without notice, and in an emergency you should call 111; delay can be dangerous and is not required.

How it works

1
Get free, plain-English legal information. Talk through your situation — separation, care of the children, the house, a divorce, or your safety — and get clear information about how New Zealand family law works and what your realistic next step is. It's general information, not legal advice, and it creates no lawyer-client relationship.
2
Understand the New Zealand rules and your Southland options. You'll find out which Act applies to your situation, what the Invercargill Family Court would expect, and which free local services — FDR mediation, Parenting Through Separation, Southland Community Law Centre — can help you move forward.
3
Get pointed to the right lawyer if you need one. If your matter needs formal legal advice or representation, we can help you connect with a New Zealand-qualified family lawyer. There's no obligation, and many people get what they need from the free conversation and the community services alone.

Free & low-cost Family Law help in Southland

If money is tight or you want to handle part of this yourself, Southland and New Zealand have genuinely good free help — official court information, free mediation and parenting courses, the local community law centre, and legal aid for those who qualify. Start with these.

The official guide to separation, care of children, dissolution and protection orders, including the forms, the two-year separation rule and the current fees. The starting point for anyone dealing with the Invercargill Family Court.
Government-funded help to pay for a lawyer if you're on a low income. Eligibility depends on your income and dependants; you may have to repay some or all of it depending on what you earn or receive. Phone 0800 2 LEGAL AID (0800 253 425).
Free legal advice and information for Southland people on low incomes, run from Floor 2, Cue Building, 33 Don Street, Invercargill (phone 03 214 3180 or 0800 550 800). Volunteer clinics, court help, and outreach across the region.
Plain-language national guide covering dissolution, dividing relationship property, parenting arrangements, protection orders and qualifying for legal aid — written for non-lawyers.
The mediation service most parents must try before applying to the Family Court for a parenting order. Free for everyone since 1 July 2025. Find an approved provider through the Ministry of Justice.
Free, confidential and independent information and advice, with an Invercargill office and a national line on 0800 367 222. Good first stop if you're not sure where to go.
The official register to check whether a lawyer holds a current practising certificate and to find a family lawyer near you in Southland.

FAQ — Family Law in Southland

How long do I have to be separated before I can get a divorce in New Zealand?

Two years. Under the Family Proceedings Act 1980, the only ground for a dissolution is that the marriage or civil union has broken down irreconcilably, and the way you prove that is by living apart for two years. You can't shorten it, even if you both agree, although you can live together for up to three months during that time while trying to reconcile without restarting the clock. Once the two years are up you apply to the Family Court (the fee is currently $242). Get the facts for your timeline before you make any plans.

Is New Zealand a no-fault divorce country — does it matter who caused the break-up?

Yes, it's no-fault, and generally no, fault doesn't matter for the divorce itself. There's only one ground — irreconcilable breakdown shown by two years living apart — so you don't plead or prove adultery or cruelty. Who "caused" the separation also doesn't change the basic 50/50 sharing of relationship property. Some conduct can be relevant to safety and to children's arrangements, so it's worth checking your specific facts.

What's the difference between custody and 'day-to-day care' in New Zealand?

New Zealand stopped using "custody" and "access". Under the Care of Children Act 2004 the law now talks about "day-to-day care" (where the child mainly lives and who meets their everyday needs) and "contact" (time with the other parent or another person). Decisions are made on the child's welfare and best interests, not on which parent is more deserving. If you can't agree, arrangements are set out in a parenting order from the Family Court.

How is our property and the family home divided when we separate?

For relationships of three years or more — married, civil union or de facto — the Property (Relationships) Act 1976 presumes equal (50/50) sharing of "relationship property", which usually includes the family home, the car, furniture and assets built up during the relationship, no matter whose name is on the title. Property you brought into the relationship, plus most gifts and inheritances, is usually "separate property" and isn't shared. Equal sharing is departed from only in narrow cases. Don't sign the house away on an assumption — get the facts first.

I'm scared for my safety in Invercargill — how do I get a protection order?

If you're in immediate danger, call 111. Otherwise, under the Family Violence Act 2018 you can apply to the Family Court for a protection order, and if your case is urgent the court can grant a temporary order without notice — before the other person is told — often within 24 to 48 hours. That temporary order becomes final by law after three months unless the respondent challenges it. The Police, Southland Community Law Centre and family lawyers can all help you apply. You do not have to wait for a hearing to be protected.

Do I have to go to court to sort out the children?

Usually not as a first step. The system is designed to keep you out of court where possible. Most separating parents are expected to attend the free Parenting Through Separation course and to try Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) mediation — now free for everyone — before the Family Court will hear a parenting application. Many families reach a workable agreement through those services without a hearing. The court is there if agreement genuinely can't be reached or there are safety concerns.

How much does it cost — are these services really free?

Several genuinely are. Family Dispute Resolution mediation has been free for everyone since 1 July 2025, and the Parenting Through Separation course is free. Southland Community Law Centre and the Citizens Advice Bureau give free information, and family legal aid can pay for a lawyer if you're on a low income (you may have to repay some of it). The main fixed cost is the $242 Family Court fee to apply for a dissolution. This information service is free too — it's general legal information, not legal advice.

How is child support worked out in New Zealand?

Child support is handled by Inland Revenue (IRD) under the Child Support Act 1991, not by the Family Court. IRD uses a formula based on both parents' incomes, the number of children and the amount of care each parent provides, and it can assess and collect payments. Parents can also agree their own arrangement. Because it's formula-driven and very fact-specific, a real figure needs your actual numbers — get the facts before you assume an amount.

We agree on everything — can we just divide things and divorce ourselves?

Partly. You can divide relationship property by agreement, but to be binding under the Property (Relationships) Act 1976 the agreement generally needs to be in writing with each of you getting independent legal advice — otherwise a court can later set it aside. You still can't apply for the dissolution itself until you've been living apart for two years. Agreeing is great and saves money, but getting the agreement done properly is what protects you later.

What about same-sex partners, civil unions and de facto couples?

The same family law applies. The Property (Relationships) Act 1976 covers married, civil union and de facto couples (including same-sex couples) equally, with the same three-year threshold for equal sharing. The Care of Children Act 2004 applies to all parents and guardians regardless of relationship type. Civil unions are dissolved under the Family Proceedings Act 1980 in the same way as marriages, and de facto couples simply end the relationship but still divide property under the same rules.

Is this legal advice, and is it confidential?

This is general legal information, not legal advice, and it does not create a lawyer-client relationship — we're not a law firm. It's meant to help you understand how New Zealand family law works and what your sensible next step is, including the free Southland services available to you. If your matter needs formal advice or court representation, we can help you connect with a New Zealand-qualified family lawyer.


Southland family lawyers: join our network

Are you a New Zealand-qualified family lawyer practising in Southland — Invercargill, Gore, Te Anau or across Murihiku? We help people understand their situation under the Care of Children Act, the Property (Relationships) Act and the Family Violence Act, then connect those who need formal advice or representation with local counsel. If you'd like to receive matched, consultation-ready referrals in your region and practice area, get in touch about joining our network. This is a path for lawyers only — it doesn't change the free, no-obligation help we give the public.

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Last updated: 21 June 2026. Reviewed by the Legal Hotline Editorial Team.

General legal information, not legal advice. We research every page from primary sources — legislation, the courts, and government legal-aid bodies — and check it for accuracy. Spotted something out of date? Tell us at admin@platfirm.ai.

Get the facts before you decide anything.

Separation, care of the children, the family home, a divorce, or your safety — New Zealand family law has clear rules, and the sooner you understand the ones that apply to you, the more options you keep. The two-year divorce clock, the 50/50 sharing rule, the day-to-day care decisions, the protection order you can get without notice — these all turn on facts and timing. Get free, plain-English legal information about your situation in Southland, with no charge and no lawyer-client relationship, and find out which free local service or lawyer is your right next step. One clear conversation is the cheapest, smartest move you can make.

Free legal information. Not legal advice.

Last updated 21 June 2026
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